Confession: I Used the Turntable for Sex Reasons

As a member of this cast, I feel it is my duty to inform you all that I did use the onstage turntable for sex things last night. The sex act took place in the theater early this morning with a member of the tech crew who wishes to remain anonymous. Said technician had the know-how to set the turntable at a respectable, steady pace of 5 revolutions per minute. Once placed in the on position, we allowed the turntable to spin as we stepped on to begin our wild ride.

So think of me, tonight while you die on the barricades and know that I too, had a little death, there on the turntable. While you hit the high notes, remember that it won’t be nearly as high as the note that I hit this morning. And when you take your final bow this evening, know that your satisfaction pales in comparison to that of mine and my booth-dwelling lover in the early hours of the morning on the turntable to freedom.

-JMF